If the same story keeps coming up how can I forgive ?? Is it possible??
If the same story keeps coming up how can I forgive ?? Is it possible??
It’s easier said than done when one tries to forgive and let go and love on without any hiccups or anything. Trying to reason out and be open to accepting a loved one no matter what. Burying the hatchet and moving on without any questions or concerns.
Getting stabbed in the back and then trying to forgive the person to keep the harmony in the relationship and going is very difficult. It takes a lot of effort and work on oneself to even take a step towards healing and accepting the faults and letting things be.
A question that would crop up often is
Why me?
What have I don’t to deserve this?
No matter what I do this keeps coming up on my space and I can’t take it!
One fact is clear here, if the past turn of events bothers you then you are not healed. These are more like ghosts of the past coming to haunt you and that’s troubling you and you don’t much like it or appreciate it. When the pain and hurt is very deep and no matter how much healing is done it still hurts.
Trust me there is more work to be done, the healing process is not something that can be done in an hour or a day. It takes time it is more like peeling an onion and peeling the layers of wounds and pain. Every time something happens the triggers needs to be looked into and the same has to be worked on again.
Does it get frustrating yes Ofcourse it does, the journey to witness and not react is a tough one. When we understand that the pain inflicted on us has been irrelevant or oblivious to your loved one. That’s even more painful than the turn of events. It takes two to tango, similarly when one is trying to let go and forgive and the other is being oblivious and cold to the whole past event.
What can one do??
Can you do anything about it?
Yes / No
If yes what can you do ?? Yes, you can express your thoughts or feelings and the other person may just brush it aside without even a blink of an eye. Then what are you going to do?
Whereas if your answer was no can’t do anything. Yes you are right in the true facts of events each one have their own free will. Choices lie within each one when things unfold and you realize that it’s not in your control. Best is to witness and step out of the situation and act not react to it.
The core fact one needs to see and understand is that one needs to do what brings them happiness and peace. Holding onto pain and the wounds will only intensify the bitterness and create ripples of confusion in the relationship. Just let things be when the stimuli is external and you cannot control it or stop it. The triggers lie within you that can be worked on and changed easily without a blink of an eye.
How do you help yourself?
- Understand the situation and know it’s not in your control. So let things be and don’t try to control or stop certain things.
- Learn to be a witness and watch the events unfolds without reacting to the whole drama.
- Getting caught in the story and living it time and again is not important. Learning the lessons and stepping out to work things out is more important.
- Know your triggers and work on clearing them or releasing them as that would be easier than trying to control the turn of events.
- Take your power back when that’s done the chances of the triggers hurting you will be way lesser and easier to handle.
- Know that there is free will and each one have their own journey and priorities and every one may not think or resonate with your thoughts.
- Expectations lead to hurt and suffering so avoid getting into the space of expecting too much. Learn to just move on without having expectations and that would make it way easier for you.
- Set and define your boundaries for yourself as well as others and when need be make it clear and express yourself that the boundaries are set.
- Nurture your self-respect and happiness and hold onto it. There is no use of letting these down or letting things go out of hand and then having regret about the same.
- Accept failures and accept the situations as they come it’s much needed as they are not really looking for your thoughts or opinions. But if need be feel free to express the same.
The biggest resistance one can have is not be open to accept and receive the learnings but caught in the entire drama that’s unfolding. This would only make the patterns repeat and to check if you learnt or nudge you to accept the facts of the lessons. These expectations can get us caught in the vicious web of how you would want things to be.
Living in the past and musing over the good times or the sacrifices done by you will lead you no where. As the first point is no one asked you to do the sacrifices or anything else. So getting caught in the past and not expecting the changes happening in the present will lead you no where other than giving you more pain and suffering from time to time.
A beautiful lesson to hold onto is to live in the moment and not get caught in drama that’s unfolding in front of you.
Certain events keep repeating for us to learn our lessons and accept ourselves.
Get in touch with Samskara Healing, if you are looking for a mentor or you need a session of healing and help remove blocks feel free to reach out and book a consultation.
🌺Palash 🌺
In Gratitude to Divine
Spiritual Healer
Samskara Healing
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